A projector flickers in the background. JAN HENDEN (25) and SIMON MOORE (24) sit on the sofa, watching the credits for The Sting roll.
JAN
Simon, I feel cheated.
SIMON
Cheated in a good way, or cheated
in a "my wallet definitely had
more money in it 2 hours ago" way?
JAN
Cheated in good way. It...reeled
us in, I suppose.
SIMON
Yes - from the very start, with
those homely little drawings
that looked like those
awful courtroom sketches they
show on the news. I thought we
were in for a bit of lightweight
’antics’, Ocean’s Eleven style.
JAN
Whoa there, Nelly. Let’s run
through the set up first.
Jan looks to camera, leaning on the back of the sofa, Roger Ebert-style.
JAN (CONT’D)
Directed by George Roy Hill, The
Sting is about a skilful but
unlucky conman, Johnny Hooker-
SIMON
Played by Robert Redford.
Jan closes Simon’s laptop lid.
JAN
Simon, get off IMDB right now.
The DVD case is right there in
front of you.
SIMON
I wanted to check who this one
guy from Spy Hard was.
Jan SIGHS. Simon puts the laptop away, disappears off-camera.
JAN
Hooker loses his best friend
Luther after getting in over his
head with a big score. Now he
must call on the help of Henry
Gondorff-
Simon calls from the bathroom.
SIMON (OFF CAMERA)
Paul Newman!
JAN
...recommended to him by Luther
as the best con artist he ever
met, to get one back on crime
boss Doyle Lonnegan-
SIMON (O.C.)
Robert Shaw!
Jan looks to the table, which is missing the DVD case.
JAN
Did you take the case in there
with you or something?
SIMON (O.C.)
...No?
JAN
Anyway. Lonnegan is the man
responsible for Luther’s death,
and these two are determined to
make him pay for it, with the
biggest sting they could ever
dream of pulling off. It’s
well-planned, well-executed and
very, very entertaining.
Simon returns from the bathroom, leaping back onto the sofa, sitting cross-legged.
SIMON
The "wire" con, or the film?
JAN
Both. And quit spoiling, you.
SIMON
There you go. "Spoiling". "Wire".
"Sting". What are they on their
own? Words, that’s what.
JAN
Well, you have words. I have
words. Let’s compare words.
SIMON
Very well.
JAN
Here’s one: incredible.
SIMON
Clever, too. The whole film is a
con, from beginning to end. It
shows all those low-level cons...
JAN
Yes! The card tricks; that genius
move at the café, pretending that
he went out the window-
SIMON
Them’s the ones.
Simon turns to camera, taking on a sly half-smile.
SIMON (CONT’D)
The film lets us in on enough of
those easy, grifter style tricks
to make us think we’re just as
smart and seasoned as Hooker and
Gondorff. And while they’re
flashing those pearly whites and
walking around those beautiful
’30s sets to a honky tonk piano
score, the plot is creeping up
behind us, ready to pull the
blanket over our eyes when we
least expect it.
JAN
So you admit you walked right
into their trap, same as
Lonnegan?
SIMON
Like a knife juggler into a
manhole, Jan: I should’ve seen it
coming, but my mind was on other
things.
JAN
My mind was on the acting. Quite
a lot.
SIMON
Can’t blame you there. You’ve got
Butch and Sundance at the helm -
Redford with his dark, stony
looks, Newman’s glibly expressive
eyes...
JAN
...and that subtle humour they
use to bounce off each other.
Loved it. There’s one scene where
Gondorff’s practising his card
trickery before the game with
Lonnegan, purely to show off to
Hooker - then he fucks it up
completely!
SIMON
Haha! And the look of sheer
horror on Hooker’s face!
JAN
Exactly! They could’ve ruined
that moment with a corny
one-liner, but they left it with
that look.
SIMON
They could’ve ruined this film so
many ways.
JAN
But they didn’t.
SIMON
They just let us revel in the
saucy glee of constantly knowing
something Lonnegan doesn’t.
JAN
Now you mention it, I think the
whole film’s premise is about
saucy glee.
SIMON
There’s a bit of a vengeance
undercurrent going on with
Hooker, but in the end, I think
it’s fair to say that’s the
quintessential spirit of the
film.
JAN
The hell with quintessential
spirits. Saucy glee was better.
Simon and Jan simultaeneously face camera.
SIMON
There you have it, then.
JAN
The Sting.
SIMON
SAUCY GLEE.
Cut to extravagant, unfathomably abstract credit sequence.
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